My Craptastic Friday

I mentioned in a previous post (that I ended up removing for fear I will someday become famous and my identity will be discovered and it could come back to haunt me) that my Friday last week was not much more organized than my Monday.  Not only did I get engulfed in a few things and forget what time it was,  which in turn made me forget to pick my child up from horse camp but I also ended up creating a new "Eau de Toilette" ......literally.

Yes, you heard me correctly.  When I finally looked up at the clock after a morning of hell I realized that it was now 11:57 am and I was due to pick my child up from camp at 12 noon.  Needless to say that wasn't going to happen because I live approximately 15-30 minutes away depending on how many laws I was willing to break.  Lord knows I broke a few on Monday so I would be chancing it if I were to try again on Friday.

Thankfully my daughter was attending camp with a friend so I was able to call her mother and ask her to grab her for me and meet me somewhere.  No sooner did I make that call was I rushing around again to head out of the door to meet her.  Found my shoes, my keys and my sunglasses quickly, thank god!!  I started to run out the door when it hit me.....right in the face!!  Holy Crap!! What is that SMELL???  Yep, my little one had pooped.

There was no way I was going to be late AND show up with an infant that had been sitting in poop for over 30 minutes too.  So I ran back upstairs, opened up the worst explosive diaper I had ever seen, then smashed it all around, smeared it in with a wet wipe and all while he rolled and spun like an alligator attacking it's prey.  I finally got him diapered and clothed then ran back down the stairs only to ask myself AGAIN, "What is that SMELL?"  Oh, right....in the words of Joe Dirt "I got the poo on meh" Great, Grand,  Fantastic!!!  Thankfully I received a mini bottle of germX in a race packet (yes, I run....but only to keep up my Trophy Wife image of course) one day and threw it in my car or I would have gotten a nickname that day for sure.

I finally met my friend who had my daughter with her.  By the way, I am thankful for friends who say nothing when you show up looking like ass and smelling like one too.

Thank God for Hot Shoes!!!!

(And here I bet you thought by the title of this blog that it was going to be a blog about how glamorous I am all of the time)

[P.S.  As I sat down to finish this post my son dug a box out of the trash that consisted of old rotten cherries, cherry pits and stems and started eating them.]